Schoolhouse Rambles

With two new administrators and approximately 30 new staff members (out of approximately 115), Southwest Guilford Middle School has gotten off to a very good start the first two days of this 2007-2008 school year. Under the leadership of new Principal Beverly Wilson, Assistant Principal Gloria Ramsey, and new Assistant Principal Billy Hardy, things have run smoothly. (Doesn't Mr. Hardy have a great last name?)

The worst thing for some of us has been dealing with uncomfortably hot classrooms. I've worn a long-sleeve shirt and tie these first two days, and I've been drenched with sweat at times. From 10:30 AM-3:45 PM (with a break from about 12:48-1:15 PM for lunch), I've been in near-constant motion in my classroom, moving back-and-forth as I speak, listen, ask, answer, write, monitor, and observe. (I admit that I'm usually sitting while writing on the overhead.) Somthing's wrong with our air conditioning, and yes, there's some suffering going on. The only comfort I can offer my students is to point out that I'm probably even less comfortable than they are, wearing hotter clothes and moving around more than they are. But it's all good. I've just come to realize that for all our amazing technological advances, the people who develop the systems designed to cool and heat our buildings still have light-years to go. Buildings are always either too hot or too cold; they're never just right. Ms. Wilson has visited my room two or three times so far, and when she visited today, she let me know that she's aware of how hot the rooms are. I appreciated her taking the time to do that, and though it's made the day slightly less pleasant, I know they're working on getting it fixed for us. There are some things that you just have to deal with and make the best of, and that's as important a lesson as any other for us all to learn. Mixed in with that lesson is the one about it being pointless, senseless, and mindless to dwell too long on certain things or to complain about them. Too much wasted time and energy involved that could be put to infinitely better use elsewhere. Some things are just beyond our complete control, and we just have to accept that.

So far, I love our team's students! "Love" probably seems like too strong a word here--I realize that it probably comes across as hyperbole. By "love," I mean that it's been easy to enjoy, appreciate, and respect our students so far. The negative signs of potentially bad things to come have not shown themselves so far. I'm just hoping that the positive vibrations are real, that the love is going to last the entire school year. Because if that's the case, there's going to be a lot of higher learning going on, and the results are going to be positive for everyone.

I haven't dealt with any major issues so far. By this point last year--if not very shortly after--I'd already had a student "MF" me in class, to the delight of some of his classmates. ("MF" doesn't stand for "Mr. Floyd.") I felt like the effects of that incident haunted that class all year long, stirring an ugly, unpleasant energy that was challenging to overcome. Unless my memory's failing me, I think my primary sin against that student was to ask him to do what all the other students were doing: to keep his head off his desk and write what I was asking them to write. There were negative signs with that student the very first day, and I was left wondering if I'd have any positive moments with him. There were actually a few positive moments with him, but they weren't lasting. And he always was within a second of flipping--it didn't take much to provoke him. He didn't stay with us all year, and I don't know what ultimately happened to him, but without some major changes, he was heading in every negative direction you can think of, seemingly eager to become a part of the horrible statistics we don't seem often enough capable of reversing.

You don't put 1000 students together and expect that there aren't going to be some students with some problems. What you try to do is control the environment as much as possible and try to figure out how to help or change the students who have problems and/or are causing problems. You try communicating with those stuents, and when necessary, you follow up with proper discipline. I've already heard of some students getting into trouble, with at least one or two directing their negative energy toward their teachers. Some of those students have a history of doing that, and whatever the solution is for turning around their attitudes and/or behaviors hasn't yet been discovered. Maybe we'll figure out those solutions this school year. For the sake of those students, for the sake of our school, and for our sake, let's hope so.

I'm excited and curious right now. Excited about how well the year has started and how much positive potential seems to exist right now. Curious to see if the positive energy can be maintained and magnified. How far can we go? How long will it last? How far and long will it extend?

While I've looked forward to these last two days, I've also finished both days feeling exhausted. I'm drained by the energy that has to be put forth to keep it all moving, to accomplish all that needs to be done. There's a beginning-of-the-year "To Do" list that stretches forever, it seems. With teaching, once the school year begins, it doesn't end until the very end of the school year. Between the first day and the last day, there's not a single day when you leave school knowing that you've done everything that needs to be done. Not if you're honest. There's always one more step that could have been taken: one more record you could have read; one more lesson you could have developed; one more decoration you could have added; one more meeting you could have scheduled or held; one more phone call you could have made, or one more e-mail you could have sent; one more field trip you could have planned; one more speaker you could have scheduled; one more note you could have written; one more set of papers you could have graded; one more text you could have studied; one more incentive you could have created; one more bulletin board you could have changed; one more activity you could have coached or sponsored; etc. Don't think there's not even more that I could have listed here. There's no peace during the school year for a school teacher, no luxury or relaxation. Even the moments you take for yourself require more work and greater preparation, and they leave you feeling guilty and unrelaxed. When you take a day off, for whatever reason, your mind still travels back to school, worrying how all's going for your sub, your teammates, and your students. You're praying and hoping that all went smoothly, that the students were better for your sub than they've even dreamed about being for you.

There's so much more to say. And of course, there's stuff that can't be said. But it's all there. It's all going on everywhere right now, in every school. Stuff most of us don't even have a clue about, though we think we do. It's everything positive and everything negative that you can possibly imagine.

My mind's spinning, right now, trying to figure out how I'm going to keep up with it all.